Nom-Nom-Nom...Survivorman!

I love quick food. There are so many days when I come home and cooking seems impossible/undesirable and takeout is a rather new concept to me... So there have been times when I've just thrown in the towel and had another bowl of cereal for dinner and called it quits. Granted, that's not the best way to go about it, but it suffices when it's just me. But now that Jack's here too, things are a little different. Since we both work, and we both do school, weeknight meals get a little interesting... Last night though was a whole different story!

All I can say is, thank goodness for Costco! They had a three pack of Patak's curry sauces and last night we cracked one open and stirred in some purple cauliflower, peas, and tofu. All of that over some brown rice made for delicious quick food that amazingly wasn't cereal! Jack and I had made naan the other day and toasted up some leftovers to accompany the dish. Oh, and seriously, purple cauliflower is Ah-May-Zing! Had never eaten it before, but recently I came across some stats regarding the unbelievably beautiful veg. Cauliflower in general is high in fiber, folates, and vitamin C. The cabbage-cousin also contains phytochemicals such as sulforaphane, carotenoids, indole-3-carbinol (the super-confab that assists in DNA repair, assists in hormone regulation, and appears to slow the growth of cancer cells), and a bunch of other awesomeness!

Seriously, cauliflower is apparently the super-veggie. The different colour variants also offer variations on the nutritional kick-assery. Purple cauliflower though, contains significant amounts of anthocyanins, antioxidants that are thought to assist in free-radical defense. When consumed as food, the health benefits of anthocyanins aren't as fantastical as one would hope because the body tends to excrete more than keep the little buggers, but eat'n 'em certainly can't hurt! I've always been a fan of cauliflower in general, so I'm hoping to start incorporating all of the colourful varieties into my diet a bit more (don't get me started on the beauty of orange cauliflower!). Taste wise, it worked SO well in this application! I personally think that the purple variety has a bit of a sweeter taste to it, which melded well with the masala.

Yum! We noshed on that while watching Les Stroud's Beyond Survival. Jack and I really get a kick out of watching survival shows and this one is a bit different in the sense that it highlights the survival techniques of peoples who live on the edges of the world. It tickles my anthropological brain. It's so obvious that Stroud isn't doing this from a scientific evaluation, but he still manages to treat their practices with respect and sensitivity. I've only seen 2 episodes of the show, and there is certainly a hefty amount of cheese associated with the framing of each episode, but I think I like it!

So, the point to the story is that apparently I need to learn to make Indian curry from scratch! I found some great recipes online that will be on next week's menu and hopefully I will be sharing them afterwards. I'm thinking of doing an evening of korma curry and a follow up of tikka masala. I have a few supplies to pick up though because I'm lacking the cardamom to make garam masala powder... Times like these make the Boise Co-Op so convenient! The spices and herbs they carry are of pretty legit quality.

And so I leave now with this last little nugget of awesome that blew my mind the other day:

The Higgs Boson Explained from PHD Comics on Vimeo.

And yeah, it's real, so - even though I don't actually understand even most of this, I am unbelievably excited for Dr. Higgs and the CERN crew. I want to make a bunch of Hadron/Hardon jokes now... 

Beautiful minds, beautiful food... Yeah, it's been a good week so far!

What is in a name?

In one of the last episodes of Gilmore Girls, Rory and Lorelei are talking about decisions. I think it's right after Rory's boyfriend proposes to her and she obviously has to make a choice between life with the man she loves, and the dreams for a career she has been chasing for her whole life. Rory is conflicted and just wants some direction but Lorelei refuses to force her hand in either direction.

"It's like the bird-versus-turtle Halloween costume all over again," Rory says. Lorelei replies,"Well, I didn't crack then, and I'm not gonna crack now. I think you just need to figure it out. And remember, that flying-turtle-bird was the most original costume in the third grade."

I don't know about anyone else, but I loved that moment. The show had kind of gone to shit by that point without it's original writer, and I was losing hope that the conclusion of the series would ever reunite us with the original spirit of the story I had fallen in love with. Yet here it was, a moment! And that moment really hit me. Of course, there are decisions whose conclusions are either yes or no, but sometimes it's equally acceptable to forge your own way and make yourself into a flying-turtle-bird.

Decisions are the bane of my existence! I'm the worst at making choices, and I usually put off the actual deciding until the absolute last moment, and by then the choice is no longer a choice, I have limited myself, and I am frustrated beyond all reckoning, with a healthy dose of self-loathing thrown in for fun. It's yet another piece of my elegant persona that is in need of work! So, when I started this blog, I had just made a decision that was uncomfortable in its aftermath. Every once in a while I pull out my DVD's of Gilmore Girls and watch through the series, and I had just watched that episode was feeling as though my whole life was one great big, ill fitting, flying-turtle-bird costume. So I did the logical thing, I bitched about it online, here!

This blog was conceived of as a place for me to try on the costume, beleaguer the state of my current existence, and hope that some order would follow. Obviously, I abandoned this whole enterprise for a while, but I'm returning to it now with the goal of some progress in my character development. That's all for tonight I suppose. Tomorrow's topic for discussion will be some rather awkward mac'n cheese and very fluffy brownies!

Teensey Yum Update

The pop-tarts were amazing! Using this recipe from BrownEyedBaker, Jackson and I made Nutella, apricot and lingonberry tarts that looked a little something like this:

Le-finished product! Pretty nice for a first try.

There was no way these things were escaping sans-sprinkles!

As an addition to the original recipe, we whipped up a little bit of a confectioner's glaze and I glooped some on as a simulation of the thick and overpowering icing on the commercially produced pop-tarts. Honestly, the apricot ones are my fave, Jack is certainly a fan of the Nutella, but I haven't yet happened upon a lingonberry tart! Jack is really enjoying them and having something like this on hand has been great for a guy who forgets to eat breakfast 75% of the time. We ended up with about 11 tarts, but I have a feeling this was due to my rectangles being a little on the thin side. I think I prefer them this way, because I'm not the worlds largest crust fan. We had a little leftover dough, but I was too lazy to work on it for a 12th tart.... Points to improve upon for next time: use an egg wash to help seal the edges of the tarts. It wasn't too bad, but several of them leaked all over the place and we ended up with some slightly empty tarts. I'm a sprinkle-whore, so the sprinkling and the icing may be a little excessive, but Jack and I are pretty satisfied with 'em! 

So, yeah! That's about it for the day... I had intended to post something a bit angstier, but decided that pop-tarts were much more entertaining. I never had pop-tarts as a kid, like the OP of the recipe, and when I finally was on my own and able to snack on whatever forbidden food I could get my hands on, I was sorely disappointed... The store bought ones were pretty disgusting, but were satisfactory enough to get me through an 8 AM Bio. class, which explains why I was so darn fascinated by the concept of making them at home. Now that I know how to make these, I'm pretty sure I don't have an excuse anymore to raid the vending machines at BSU.

Not so Doris Day!

I think that I totally missed the "housecleaning gene" if something of that sort could really exist! Domesticity is NOT my strong suit. As a kid, our house was always a disaster, mainly because we were going in every different direction at all hours of the day. It was insanely hard to keep up with a presentable home when between school, work and Sis and I, strangers were also traipsing around the house for Dad's business. The downstairs looked relatively presentable most of the time, but the rest of the house was usually relatively demolished! Moving down here was interesting because for the first time I was responsible for my own space. Alas, the habits were set and in Boise I've been battling my tendency for slovenliness with some success.

When it was the Roomie and I living here, I alternated between phases of an almost bipolar housekeeping practice. Roomie and I would trade off having months of anal attentiveness to apartment, and months of pretty hardcore negligence. Now that I live with Jackson, things are a little different. Roomie wanted a clean house as much as myself, but Jackson feels a little less of that compulsion. Not that he's a complete slob, it's just that he doesn't really feel much of a need to have things really clean and when cleaning actually occurs he doesn't really seem to do deep cleans. I think he just doesn't see dirty! He tries though, and that means there is hope for us. Huzzah!

Since one of my old friends came down from CDA for a visit, there was no way in Hell she was going to see the normal dishevelment of my abode! So, I set to cleaning the place with a vengeance. Jack really tried to help, but he wasn't the most useful of participants. Angie (the visiting friend) came, saw, and conquered my newly tidied place, and the aftermath leaves us with a ground zero that will hopefully be maintained! Who knows... More than anything though, this has led me to understand the monumental amount of cleaning supplies I never use.

Just a little disconcerting. When did I start to hoard so many chemicals? When I first moved down here I think the most I had was some Simple Green, toilet cleaner and some dish soap! Suddenly I have two kinds of carpet cleaner, Barkeepers Friend, Comet, Simple Green, chlorine bleach, window cleaner, two kinds of dish soap, and so much more.... It's a little intimidating now to peek under my sink and find the cleaner army hiding in the darkness. I think I will make it a goal to diminish the amount of cleaners in my home soon, well as soon as we run out at least. Jack and I have discussed using vinegar cleaners before, but I don't think it had much reinforcement until reading today's entry at Sweet Roots. I love that Mary was contemplating kitchen clutter as well!

By far the best advantage of getting the apartment in order is the fact that I can really use my kitchen for some fun! Jackson and I made some delicious Thai curry and homemade PopTarts! Not entirely sure about the success of the PopTarts, they look good, but tomorrow's breakfast will be the true test. We'll see!

Yeah, my template was a Celestial Seasonings Tea box! 

I'm thinking of using this as a place to review recipes, discuss books, and of course whine about the usual mundane in my life. I wonder if that would be worth reading? I've been meaning to post more regularly and perhaps making these recipes will provide the motivation I need to actually update this thing. Anyhoo, until next time!

Green With... Sorrel?

I've got a bad case of the greens; little monsters everywhere... Recently I've been getting in touch with several old friends with whom I had lost contact after several school changes and moving down here to Boise. It really is amazing the ways that we can find one another nowadays! I was lucky with friends in the two high schools I attended. Back home, I found these eclectic and compassionate people who really filled in the more drab areas of my life. However, when I changed schools, I lost touch with nearly all of them because I am an awful friend. I admit it! I'm a terrible friend.... Communication is my strong point, so long as I'm in contact with you on a regular basis, but move to another school, another city, and I'm incommunicado... It's something that I'm only now just getting a handle on.

Learning about everyone's lives, accomplishments and triumphs is proving to be equal parts exciting and terrifying, though. Jackson thinks that I have the propensity to measure the worst in myself against the best in all others. Perhaps there's a grain of truth in that, but right now the green bits of me are feeling very loud and I keep running into this feeling that I'm just not measuring up to snuff. One of my friends is PUBLISHING as an undergrad (amazing!!!). Talk about feeling inferior! I have quite a bit to be proud of (I think...), but it's hard to feel very enthused when it feels like there is a substantial amount of treading water going on and very little return. I'm getting to this point where the goals I set for myself are no longer satisfying and this is abjectly terrifying.

I've been here before, but with my current status in life, I'm having a hard time putting things in adequate perspective, and so I am green... Should I ditch academia and start up that bookstore I've always dreamed of? Is the simplicity of that aspiration compatible with the part of me that wants to get my PhD and meaningfully contribute to society through that sort of outlet? What about my aspirations for a family? Could I just complete the bachelors and embrace a domestic life? Mommy-envy has been plaguing me for a while now as well! Several of my friends down here and up north are nesting and the life they display is so attractive, but I know that behind each Instagram photo of the cherubic little kid is a screaming tyrant in T-2 min... But perhaps that life is as attractive as it seems... I've always wanted to be a mother and yet I never contemplated actually being a mother. 


And so the final green monster, and the one I choose to absorb myself with post-post, is a bunch of sorrel that has been chilling in my fridge for the past day and a half. I've never cooked with the green and yet it looked so lovely at the market this past Saturday that I was compelled to buy a bunch. But what to make? I have issues actually cooking a lot of greens because I love the taste of raw foods so I wanted to make something raw, but sorrel is a bit bitter for my taste. Lucky me, one of the friends I've been reconnecting with suggested making a pesto out of it. So, I'm off to the blender to pulverize some sorrel, garlic, walnuts, and a tomato. At least there is one green monster I can overcome this afternoon! 

EDIT: The finished product! It was delicious, and I think it's a make again! Into the blender went a bunch of sorrel, 1/2 of a tomato, 1/2 clove of garlic, about 1/4 cups of olive oil, 1/4 cup of walnuts, a pinch of rosemary and basil each, freshly ground S+P, and as a final touch I stirred in some feta cheese. The whole mess went wonderfully over some whole wheat spaghetti and I sprinkled some more cheese on top and finished it off with a couple of tomato slices. Jack wasn't really the biggest fan of this combo, but I think that it is mostly because he's not into pesto's in general. Nuts aren't really his thing! 

Revelations

So, with the new attention drawn to the suicides in the GLBT communities, I just had a revelation of my own. One of my closest friends just came out to me and I feel awful.... I mean I have known this person for ages and here we are at 22 and I only now get the news flash... He is the most balanced, oddly practical and uniquely kindest individual I have ever known, and I kinda had the idea that maybe he felt this way, but he never said anything and I don't think I ever came out and asked... The terrible feeling-ness comes from the fact that I must have been putting off the "I can't handle this information" vibe because it's taken him this long to tell me...

I put a premium on trust and I have gone to this person over and over again in almost every crisis in my life, unloaded on him, cried at him, crushed on him, and confided in him and yet while I narrated my entire life-insanity to him, he never once felt that he could tell me. You have to understand how much I love this man. Don't get me wrong, I adore the Boyfriend, he is the love of my life, but, (we'll call this new addition Best Man) BM is probably the one who taught me how to deal, accept and love... He is kinda a standard in my life, I know he's not going anywhere and if he does I think I will have quite the crisis of self... I have taken advantage of BM, I have been a bitch to him, I think I once threw a shoe at him... (Why the hell should he trust me!?!) And then there have been the all night movie-nights, the "I'm making curry for you!" evenings, the "my boyfriend just broke up with me..." sob fests, the "I'm bored, can I watch you kill things online for a while?" afternoons... He deserves better on all counts... He has had a rough time of things but will shrug it off and tell me to mind my own life. "He doesn't want to burden me with it" and he just keeps whatever he is thinking to himself...

I want to give him more in life, but I know I can only work on our friendship and earning his trust where he has valiantly stood up to mine. I hope that we don't have anymore secrets like this between us, but even if we do I hope that he understands that I want to know, even if he doesn't want to tell me. I don't want to be one of those people who ostracizes others because of their difference. I don't think I would be the person I am if I didn't have BM in my life. I know that I am a better person because of him, there are times that I wonder where I would be if he hadn't been there to offer sanctuary when the ugliness was consuming me. I love this man and I want him to know it. I never want him to be one of those pieces of statistical data proving that American society is so contradictingly unbending and judgmental that it will sacrifice the beauty of human experience to arcane taboos... He is worth more than that, we all are.

And Now for Something Completely Different...

I just don't understand Mao Zedong... Ok, so I know that this is a random turn of events, but I honestly don't know what the guy was really about! Part of me wants to say that he was an evil, despotic, sick and inhuman individual who was responsible for hundreds of thousands of individuals. The other half of me wants to believe that he was genuinely trying to make things better for China and her people. I honestly can't make up my mind!

I think that the problem lies in the fact that there is so much myth surrounding the man. You honestly can't get at the truth. So much of China is hellbent on attempting to fuzz Mao up... It feels like there is too much political cover up surrounding him. Biographical survey talks about this man who burned through women and political supporters like a wildfire. He had many children, yet few of them lived and far too many of the dead died alone, casualties to their father's political ambitions. Although he was fanatically confident in his own abilities and marginal education, the man took on the task of reinventing China, to the point of destruction several times. Yet he is a heroic figure to the Chinese and earned the trust and adoration of millions. I honestly do not understand how he did this though.

Then there is the question of his personal life and health. What happened with all of those wives of his?! And the supposed "orgies" he engaged in with young girls? What about his supposed STD's? Did he really die of heart complications due to the effects of tertiary syphilis, or was it really just the last heart attack to do him in? Does it even really matter though, what his personal life was like? Does who he was in private really affect or influence his god-like status?

So can anyone honestly tell me who Mao Zedong really was? I doubt that, and I wish I didn't but that is just that. The man died, the country loves him and even if they were able to assign truth to Mao's life would it really change anything? Sorry, guess this is a little silly of a diatribe, but here I am encountering Mao for the second time in my life and even though it doesn't really affect me much personally, Mao's influence is all over modern China... What does it mean to me as a student entering into a world that will probably be heavily dominated by China as they gain more and more of the affluence that Americans are abandoning? How do I compete with a mentality so hugely dominated by Mao if I don't understand him?

Rar...